I'm Carrie (Caroline), I'm interested in meeting people who are similar to me. Have been anorexic (bouts of recovery) for many years now. Currently I am enormous, I feel, though my bmi is "normal". Most people think I'm "recovered", though they only care if I'm eating. They don't realise it's not all about the food.
I do wonder if I'll ever be better. And I swing from really really wanting to recover and be as happy as I can, to making myself so miserable by not eating and ending up in hospital. Story of my life...or at least, it's been the story for 15 or so years.